April 1st marks National Caregivers’ Day, a day to recognize and celebrate the over 8 million unpaid caregivers across Canada. These individuals provide vital personal care, emotional support, and physical assistance to their loved ones—whether family, friends, or neighbours. Often at great personal cost, their unwavering dedication and selflessness enhance the quality of life for those they care for. The resilience and compassion of these caregivers is nothing short of inspiring. At Empower Simcoe, we are privileged to share the story of one of our Family Relief participants, shedding light on the powerful impact of caregiving and the vital support these individuals provide.
When I was asked to share my story as an unpaid caregiver, I reflected on my 67 years of life. Caregiving has been a significant part of my journey. I am married with three children: a daughter-in-law and a son-in-law (separated). We have four grandchildren—three living and one in heaven.
At 22, we welcomed our first child, a son. Shortly after his birth, I was alone, and a doctor informed me he might have hypothyroidism or Down syndrome. I discarded the booklet he handed me, listing all the things he wouldn’t be able to do, stating, “That’s not my son.” When we learned of his Down syndrome diagnosis at six weeks, I firmly rejected the idea of institutionalizing him.
At the beginning of our journey, we were sent paperwork that the focus of the agency was a family-centred approach, and in my experience, there is also a focus on the person-directed approach. I believe both are equally important for each member of the family’s mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health. For 45 years, I have been a strong advocate for our son’s integration into schools, community activities, church, and job placements. He has participated in various milestones and experiences that have been gifts in enriching our son and our family.
My role as a caregiver has been challenged by my husband’s health issues, including heart attacks, other related heart issues, and cancer treatments. He is currently cancer-free, undergoing preventative care treatments, and doing well. I also care for my 89-year-old mother, who has dementia and recently fractured her hip. We had to transition her to assisted living due to her increasing care needs.
A particularly painful chapter of our life was when our granddaughter was diagnosed with stage 4 neuroblastoma at the age of four. While our granddaughter was at SickKids Hospital, her brother and sister lived with us. Her life, her illness, her love, her presence, and her death at the age of 5 years affected us profoundly, leaving a lasting impact on our family. The love and support we received during that time were truly miraculous.
Throughout my journey, I have learned the importance of self-care. As my husband has said, it’s like a car’s gas tank; if it’s empty, the car won’t run. I’ve realized that while my son has special needs, we all have unique needs. I have learned that I am not alone. I am still learning to ask for help. It is crucial to have support and to speak with safe people and agencies. To be heard. It is of the utmost importance to have financial support through funding. I am extremely grateful for the respite funding and respite opportunities through the Empower Simcoe Family Relief Program.
We have gone through a lot of challenges, traumas, and a lot of joys. But for the grace of God, I can truly say that we go through life one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time, and/or even one minute at a time. We are surrounded by a lot of love and support. We continue to give a lot of love and support. For all of this, I am truly grateful.
